nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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