no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize