im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
