tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
