my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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