so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
