I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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