i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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