i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
that may or may not have been my penis.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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