If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
