No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
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