Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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