Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
