Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
