We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.