Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
