Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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