hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
