honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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