It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
