New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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