Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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