Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
party gras won. party gras always wins.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
