It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
