dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize