Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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