i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
