All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
