only if we run a train.
done.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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