i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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