i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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