I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Randomize
