I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
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