love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
and you fell through a lawn chair
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
