I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
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