I must be too annoying 4 u.
3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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