and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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