He felt like a one man threesome
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
