Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
