it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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