Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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