There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Randomize
