that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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