Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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