I just made out with a guy for $7.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
