Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
