so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
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Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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