it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
