Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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