i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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